to stho, if u know what i mean.
well, it's okay, it's alright,
now that every knows
u have nothing to hide.
im doing u a favor. yeah u dont want it. but heck. im learning from govts across the world and bein paternalistic. say u dont know what is good for urself so u underconsume this. hah.
to nigel
the video has to be of acceptable clarity, her face must be discernible and the sound crisp. the question must be phrased to be clear without reasonable doubt and without anyway to wriggle out. the answer must not be muffled. post it on youtube and come claim $50.
teachers day at rjc is quite stupid. the bands sucked, but the vocalist of the rg band is not bad. boyahs were cool too.
went back to ri. as usual niuyi asks funny questions and stho supplies inappropriate answers. aiyahs. ocj. yuen was quite funny. hah. talk alot of cock about invitations and ss and geog. david fong. congrats.
talked cock with liqian
then they went to play soccer. damn they have a synthetic turf. no more muddy shoes man. it was nice, lq wanted to lick it. 4pt v all other geps. elitist game. haha. walked about a bit.
took bus home.
slacking now.
Friday, August 31, 2007
Wednesday, August 29, 2007
zhongguorencaolaowai
my posts in my mafiadon69 blog were super vulgar and sarcastic and spastic and incoherent. just like posts at donnation.
good night.
good night.
Muddy Grass
today for pe we played soccer on the muddy field.
we got onto the field. it was soggy from yesterdays rain.
i took of my shoes and dumped them at the stadium steps.
the field from where i was looked like muddy grass
smelt like muddy grass
what i was stepping on, felt like muddy grass too.
i havent played barefooted on a field since my ri days. that was during ncc. i hardly play such games on my own accord. wuss. thats right. whatever.
running on the muddy field, it just felt so familiar, so comforting. mud splattered on my clothes, but heck im not the one washing it. mud did not feel dirty. it felt like, my friend. as it clumped up between my toes, it felt good.
maybe rj mud is different from sarimbun mud. or maybe we were terrorised little sec 1s then as they tortured us incessantly, what with pouring water n making the place muddier before we had to use our clothes to make a path across. it was pure hazing, pure hazing in the guise of imbuing the rafflesian spirit. but i guess it worked to a certain extent. we got close n we started to love mud. after obs we loved sand as well, anyway.
it felt good running up and down even though people wouldnt pass the ball to a wuss. i wouldnt want to have the ball passed to me, esp when people like justin are around. his larger mass gives him greater momentum. and the stopping time is already damn long for me. we felt like we were maneuvering battleships across the field. have to decide on the course way ahead. and at the same time ensure we dont fall. esp during corners.
the feeling was magic.
i just had to take the opposing stand. heehee.
i should be mugging but im not.
and to samuel, there are better fish in the ocean. and who cares what she thinks.
hah.
we got onto the field. it was soggy from yesterdays rain.
i took of my shoes and dumped them at the stadium steps.
the field from where i was looked like muddy grass
smelt like muddy grass
what i was stepping on, felt like muddy grass too.
i havent played barefooted on a field since my ri days. that was during ncc. i hardly play such games on my own accord. wuss. thats right. whatever.
running on the muddy field, it just felt so familiar, so comforting. mud splattered on my clothes, but heck im not the one washing it. mud did not feel dirty. it felt like, my friend. as it clumped up between my toes, it felt good.
maybe rj mud is different from sarimbun mud. or maybe we were terrorised little sec 1s then as they tortured us incessantly, what with pouring water n making the place muddier before we had to use our clothes to make a path across. it was pure hazing, pure hazing in the guise of imbuing the rafflesian spirit. but i guess it worked to a certain extent. we got close n we started to love mud. after obs we loved sand as well, anyway.
it felt good running up and down even though people wouldnt pass the ball to a wuss. i wouldnt want to have the ball passed to me, esp when people like justin are around. his larger mass gives him greater momentum. and the stopping time is already damn long for me. we felt like we were maneuvering battleships across the field. have to decide on the course way ahead. and at the same time ensure we dont fall. esp during corners.
the feeling was magic.
i just had to take the opposing stand. heehee.
i should be mugging but im not.
and to samuel, there are better fish in the ocean. and who cares what she thinks.
hah.
Tuesday, August 28, 2007
erh..
second post today.
watched two movies just now.actually,i did not pay attention at all (i still cannot recognise the cast at the ending of the movie). just feel that should do something meaningless to slow down myself and to really have a rest!
i used to miss the old days.cause they always seemed better than the life i was having.
but,maybe too busy,or too old,i eventually forgot them,
or let go of them.
dun understand how can ppl get emotional?cause all that passed has already gone,no matter how much you appreciated or loved or missed,they would just simply not come back.
and ppl are selfish, that is true, no need to argue.
they will settle in new environment fast enough,good for them,good for the people around.
still can remember when i study english for the first time,
the teacher told me that to learn good english, you have to learn the western culture also,
that is totally different from china's communism.
the word "I" is the only word that has to be capitalised all the time,
and i shows that how important "I" am, not you, or he or she or whatever.
it seems ridiculous, but the teacher did make her point.
different from china, we are no longer required to think of others before yourself as we were taught in primary school
life is becoming simple, you dun even need to hide, juse concern aboput your business, others' matters are their very own problems.
it has been proven by my life in singapore, which i still struggling to settle in.
and we no need to follow the moral of the story of "kong rong rang li"
if we treat others good, it just proves that WE are NICE. its not a duty for us to be NICE to others at all..even your good friend.
life just screwed.
cultures collide,
memories faded,
philosophy contradict,
i am lost..
watched two movies just now.actually,i did not pay attention at all (i still cannot recognise the cast at the ending of the movie). just feel that should do something meaningless to slow down myself and to really have a rest!
i used to miss the old days.cause they always seemed better than the life i was having.
but,maybe too busy,or too old,i eventually forgot them,
or let go of them.
dun understand how can ppl get emotional?cause all that passed has already gone,no matter how much you appreciated or loved or missed,they would just simply not come back.
and ppl are selfish, that is true, no need to argue.
they will settle in new environment fast enough,good for them,good for the people around.
still can remember when i study english for the first time,
the teacher told me that to learn good english, you have to learn the western culture also,
that is totally different from china's communism.
the word "I" is the only word that has to be capitalised all the time,
and i shows that how important "I" am, not you, or he or she or whatever.
it seems ridiculous, but the teacher did make her point.
different from china, we are no longer required to think of others before yourself as we were taught in primary school
life is becoming simple, you dun even need to hide, juse concern aboput your business, others' matters are their very own problems.
it has been proven by my life in singapore, which i still struggling to settle in.
and we no need to follow the moral of the story of "kong rong rang li"
if we treat others good, it just proves that WE are NICE. its not a duty for us to be NICE to others at all..even your good friend.
life just screwed.
cultures collide,
memories faded,
philosophy contradict,
i am lost..
because what was there is gone
argh fuck. the roof is leaking again. heard the rain was damn heavy. not as bad as the last time when water cascaded down through the skylight, but little streaks. fuck. my maid noticed it at 1pm and she didnt do anything about it?! what the hell? told her to call me or anyone else when this happens and she didnt? she thought it wasnt serious? we employed her to make this kinda decisions? argh.
hopefully the contractor comes before anymore shit happens. in the mean time i shall blog.
mentoring the kids is becoming hell for me. they are just too different from me, too different from what i expect. their background is really different.
well the cool boy asked all sorts of stupid questions again, including why two dollars and five cents is written as $2.05 and not $2.5 its actually a little hard to understand this especially when u r like 4 years old. this boy is double that age. heard he lied to zhenan, apparently that class has mowed ahead and is toward the end of the book and he still is at money. what the hell man. well i was there once, except i knew how to count, especially money. but procrastination setting in so young is surprising.
his sister is in an equally bad state. what happens is a tutor gives her questions to do on the next topic and somehow thinks she can find the answers. today is electricity. fk. and she doesnt know anything about electricity. and this is really hard to believe. as in, whats the point of this man? surely u r slacking or stupid or trying to be funny? she is just p4, u expect her to be driven enough to read ahead? u expect her to know without teaching? if she could do both she wouldnt be at the center and she wouldnt need your tuition.
their standard of english is also extremely bad. a p1 boy cannot conjugate singular and plural tenses, a p3 boy cannot tell the difference between A, An and The. and try to do worksheets by assessing the pattern. like, 12121 or something stupid like that.i almost went nuts.
and some are really vulgar. well i might have slight amnesia, but i dont remember using fuck at the tender age of 9. well at that age i dont think most boys can fuck anything or even turn rigid enough. maybe at p3 i used idiot and shit. nothing more. this boy carried a tune on fuck. poorly. and he told the girl to fuck off. walau whats this man. quite shocking, really, especially when on the hierachy of vulgarities fuck ranks super high. (low on the list are shit and screw and damn and hell)
i feel guilty everytime i go. i feel guilty everytime i leave. esp when aaron isnt there its quite hard for 2 of us to control so many of them. and we dont give each of them adequate attention. well each of them goes to the center for 1 hr, but how much of our time is apportioned to each. some, like harmajeet gets 1/2 hr, some, like the quiet girl, under 5mins. what makes this worse is that everyone is progressing at his own pace and at his own level. the whole thing is a rambunctious mess.
we arent teachers. as much as the teachers in school suck, they have received some formal training and theories of education. both of us? nothing, just the experience of having been taught. zhenan never attended primary school here. i did, almost 5 years ago. things have changed since then. n bluntly, we are more intellectually privileged relative to them, and it is much easier for us to grasp these silly concepts. so we, especially, i get impatient and irritated when people ask me questions like why is it furniture and not furnitures three times over.
they dont get the attention by the people who should. theres totally no quality in this. i dont see them benefiting. but i guess im not going to do anything about this. when i picked this cip up i cautioned myself not to grow too emotionally attached to them and dont let their problems become my problems as well. im not going to lose sleep over these issues.
was blogsurfing yesterday and i read this on hweeleongs blog.
"I used to drag my heavy bag filled with textbooks and the cluttered file to class, collapse onto my seat and snooze until the assembly bell rang, and then scurry to the astroturf to assemble. Then it was walking back to class and chatting with everyone until the teacher came in and then it's chatting again and it repeats itself until recess. Yes recess. The concept of a common break. Nobody appreciates it until it's gone. Nobody appreciated how the hundred plus people you've been growing up with for 4 whole years are all conveniently placed in classrooms in one single row. Nobody appreciated how despite all the cliques in class, nothing really posed much of a barrier because we were all guys. Nobody appreciated the noise people made, the jokes people cracked in class, the teasings and laughter which became part and parcel of everyday classroom life."
ri life was really life. thats what student life should be all about. about playing cchess everyday. talkingcock. telling jokes about each other. sure, the element of girls wasnt present then, but are they really present now? yea girls exist in rj, but not the type. all that happens is that relationships in rj become superficial and stupid. other than in your cliques, of again, guys, everyone is diplomatic to the point of hypocrisy. people u dont already know, u wont get to know, truly, deeply, fully. people become bimbotic and retarded. i miss ri.
and i want to go back for teachers day. yet all the lil 4p baskets have to go back to their pri schs. sammy n dom n gang gng back to acsp, i heard st hildas gng back. argh screw all of u man. why nobody goes back to ri. ri is the place. especially for me. pri sch was juz a sad nightmare i dont want to bring up again. i miss the birthday celebrations. i miss all the nigel abusing. i miss all of these. but theyre all over.
emptiness. what is my life all about? why am i living? i dont know. i wont know. but for once, i care.
hopefully the contractor comes before anymore shit happens. in the mean time i shall blog.
mentoring the kids is becoming hell for me. they are just too different from me, too different from what i expect. their background is really different.
well the cool boy asked all sorts of stupid questions again, including why two dollars and five cents is written as $2.05 and not $2.5 its actually a little hard to understand this especially when u r like 4 years old. this boy is double that age. heard he lied to zhenan, apparently that class has mowed ahead and is toward the end of the book and he still is at money. what the hell man. well i was there once, except i knew how to count, especially money. but procrastination setting in so young is surprising.
his sister is in an equally bad state. what happens is a tutor gives her questions to do on the next topic and somehow thinks she can find the answers. today is electricity. fk. and she doesnt know anything about electricity. and this is really hard to believe. as in, whats the point of this man? surely u r slacking or stupid or trying to be funny? she is just p4, u expect her to be driven enough to read ahead? u expect her to know without teaching? if she could do both she wouldnt be at the center and she wouldnt need your tuition.
their standard of english is also extremely bad. a p1 boy cannot conjugate singular and plural tenses, a p3 boy cannot tell the difference between A, An and The. and try to do worksheets by assessing the pattern. like, 12121 or something stupid like that.i almost went nuts.
and some are really vulgar. well i might have slight amnesia, but i dont remember using fuck at the tender age of 9. well at that age i dont think most boys can fuck anything or even turn rigid enough. maybe at p3 i used idiot and shit. nothing more. this boy carried a tune on fuck. poorly. and he told the girl to fuck off. walau whats this man. quite shocking, really, especially when on the hierachy of vulgarities fuck ranks super high. (low on the list are shit and screw and damn and hell)
i feel guilty everytime i go. i feel guilty everytime i leave. esp when aaron isnt there its quite hard for 2 of us to control so many of them. and we dont give each of them adequate attention. well each of them goes to the center for 1 hr, but how much of our time is apportioned to each. some, like harmajeet gets 1/2 hr, some, like the quiet girl, under 5mins. what makes this worse is that everyone is progressing at his own pace and at his own level. the whole thing is a rambunctious mess.
we arent teachers. as much as the teachers in school suck, they have received some formal training and theories of education. both of us? nothing, just the experience of having been taught. zhenan never attended primary school here. i did, almost 5 years ago. things have changed since then. n bluntly, we are more intellectually privileged relative to them, and it is much easier for us to grasp these silly concepts. so we, especially, i get impatient and irritated when people ask me questions like why is it furniture and not furnitures three times over.
they dont get the attention by the people who should. theres totally no quality in this. i dont see them benefiting. but i guess im not going to do anything about this. when i picked this cip up i cautioned myself not to grow too emotionally attached to them and dont let their problems become my problems as well. im not going to lose sleep over these issues.
was blogsurfing yesterday and i read this on hweeleongs blog.
"I used to drag my heavy bag filled with textbooks and the cluttered file to class, collapse onto my seat and snooze until the assembly bell rang, and then scurry to the astroturf to assemble. Then it was walking back to class and chatting with everyone until the teacher came in and then it's chatting again and it repeats itself until recess. Yes recess. The concept of a common break. Nobody appreciates it until it's gone. Nobody appreciated how the hundred plus people you've been growing up with for 4 whole years are all conveniently placed in classrooms in one single row. Nobody appreciated how despite all the cliques in class, nothing really posed much of a barrier because we were all guys. Nobody appreciated the noise people made, the jokes people cracked in class, the teasings and laughter which became part and parcel of everyday classroom life."
ri life was really life. thats what student life should be all about. about playing cchess everyday. talkingcock. telling jokes about each other. sure, the element of girls wasnt present then, but are they really present now? yea girls exist in rj, but not the type. all that happens is that relationships in rj become superficial and stupid. other than in your cliques, of again, guys, everyone is diplomatic to the point of hypocrisy. people u dont already know, u wont get to know, truly, deeply, fully. people become bimbotic and retarded. i miss ri.
and i want to go back for teachers day. yet all the lil 4p baskets have to go back to their pri schs. sammy n dom n gang gng back to acsp, i heard st hildas gng back. argh screw all of u man. why nobody goes back to ri. ri is the place. especially for me. pri sch was juz a sad nightmare i dont want to bring up again. i miss the birthday celebrations. i miss all the nigel abusing. i miss all of these. but theyre all over.
emptiness. what is my life all about? why am i living? i dont know. i wont know. but for once, i care.
expect too much
seriously,you are expecting too much..
nice! sorry,im just expect a good friend..
"dun friend then dun friend lah, like important like that!"
fuck!
life has been quite nice recently,
except today maybe..
did not want to wake up in the morning.
maybe because slept quite late yesterday, mugging chem..
hav to teach, so must make sure myself understand first..
be responsibile to the person who gonna ask u questions!
took a cab to school,
receive belated birthday present from council..(i dun mind)
thanks everyone, i love it!
haha, though its childish.
li qian also like it alot.. and i think the girls also..
math lecture was a waste of life.
she went through the notes damn 'fast'!
i finish today's lecture in the last lecture.
then everything goes quite fast.
and i only remembered that my arm was 'raped' again with some random purple ink.
break was f up.
the rain was damn heavy.
even sitting in the middle of the canteen still got wet.
don hang around with yiheng they all.
so aar and i went to some ulu place and eat jap food which aar has to chop first before ate it.
pw!!!!
as expected,
my grp is really hopeless liao..
not because the group is not doing work, just the group cannot progress at all now!
anyway, im totally screwed by pw and really start to think the meaning of life so that to make sense of pw..
in vain, i found it more pointless..
cip.
the kids are hypoactive!
pls,boys and girls.
im damn tired today and damn screwed up by my friend and pw!
so please!!! BE QUIET! AND DO YOUR WORK!
afterall, they are quite nice when i gave them sweet..??!!
you just make my day, thanks!
nice! sorry,im just expect a good friend..
"dun friend then dun friend lah, like important like that!"
fuck!
life has been quite nice recently,
except today maybe..
did not want to wake up in the morning.
maybe because slept quite late yesterday, mugging chem..
hav to teach, so must make sure myself understand first..
be responsibile to the person who gonna ask u questions!
took a cab to school,
receive belated birthday present from council..(i dun mind)
thanks everyone, i love it!
haha, though its childish.
li qian also like it alot.. and i think the girls also..
math lecture was a waste of life.
she went through the notes damn 'fast'!
i finish today's lecture in the last lecture.
then everything goes quite fast.
and i only remembered that my arm was 'raped' again with some random purple ink.
break was f up.
the rain was damn heavy.
even sitting in the middle of the canteen still got wet.
don hang around with yiheng they all.
so aar and i went to some ulu place and eat jap food which aar has to chop first before ate it.
pw!!!!
as expected,
my grp is really hopeless liao..
not because the group is not doing work, just the group cannot progress at all now!
anyway, im totally screwed by pw and really start to think the meaning of life so that to make sense of pw..
in vain, i found it more pointless..
cip.
the kids are hypoactive!
pls,boys and girls.
im damn tired today and damn screwed up by my friend and pw!
so please!!! BE QUIET! AND DO YOUR WORK!
afterall, they are quite nice when i gave them sweet..??!!
you just make my day, thanks!
Sunday, August 26, 2007
trifling friend indeed
life sucks with pw.
pwimping
is damn shitty when u dunno what ur doing n u dunno what is expected of u. its like feeling around inside a dark box in some fear factor show man. yucks.
and all the effort
i feel like a shit.
id feel more like a shit especially when i see the grades back.
aww fkfkfk.
tomorrow would be a shit day
h3 econs
n klow meeting
damn all of it.
argh.
blackadder goes forth!
pwimping
is damn shitty when u dunno what ur doing n u dunno what is expected of u. its like feeling around inside a dark box in some fear factor show man. yucks.
and all the effort
i feel like a shit.
id feel more like a shit especially when i see the grades back.
aww fkfkfk.
tomorrow would be a shit day
h3 econs
n klow meeting
damn all of it.
argh.
blackadder goes forth!
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