National Day Reflections

today i shall feast on cardboard paus
but before i get my hands on them, i shall suck on my hotwheels toy cars.

rj is an enclave for prcs. my class, full of them. my cca, full of them. dean's lists, full of them (even GP!). prcs are everywhere. apparently, they are more than a third of the student population.

PRCs have revolutionised the way i look at things and the way i think of life. it is not that im some pathetic voyeur with a prc fetish, but they somehow always appear in my line of sight. if i were to draw a range card, they would be everywhere. like a swarm of locusts.

they have taught me a lot that i would like to share with the sad pathetically small readership. dear readership. but before i do, let me remind everyone, including the blog co-owner yaoyao, that im not a prc hater. i have never and will never be a card carrying 'red china' hater.

the greatest lesson learnt from prcs is learnt on the mrt. i have stopped taking mrt home since i found 157 as a cool, posh commute so i can avoid the the north.

Lesson 1: Everyone on the MRT is either deaf or doesnt deserve a quiet ride.

on multiple occasions, these prcs enjoy talking very loudly. now i know its unfair to single them out, but clearly they stand out when doing this. they have this accent that would immediately giveaway that they are foreigners. and they keep doing it. anyway why am i talking about this.

they bring being irritating to a whole new level. i often took the train during the peak period of around 6pm. during this time, almost all the trains lack even proper standing room as we're crammed up (as if on cattle cars used to transport us to treblinka). so these coolios have seats, but on opposite sides. and woots, they carry on a loud conversation even when they cannot actually see each other, shouting at the top of their voices like everyday's sunday.

and this did not happen just once, or twice. it happened at least five times, this year alone. it is almost a social phenomenon man.

Lesson 2: We all love to learn English with a cool accent.

somehow time is so precious. not time per se, but their time. everytime when the train stops at sun plaza, a horde of them would board. then they would start teach their kids. 'Ap-per-le' 'Joh-ne want-se to go to the playgroh-nd'. i dont want to playa-hate, but we know that some of you have adopted a cool cockney hackneyed accent or a cool yankee doodle one, buut pleeeese, give the other commuters some peace.

Lesson 3: The MRT is a sports stadium.

china is a sporting nation, even if their imports have all failed. and they probably excel in throwing. singaporeans 'chope' seats with all sorts of crap, even tissue paper. but they epitomize 'chope-ing'. they 'chope' from a distance.

what happens is that when they spy an empty seat with their eagle eyes, they immediately swoop down as if the seat was a succulent sheep and hurl their bag or whatever crap at the seat, before walking over. if it was a depot train its ok, but the train was quite full. nice. i was impressed.

Lesson 4: Seats are always available.

i heard about this from my mom, but recently i saw it with my own eyes! i was impressed! o pleeese, even the biblical moses would be impressed.

it is rush hour, the whole train is damn full. then suddenly a prc lady boards the train and she swoops in for the kill! the whole row of seats are filled, but suddenly she adopts a divers position with hands in a spear in front of her body and spears between two seats! then she quickly seats down. in the following moments somebody is displaced from his seat and ta-da! she has gotten herself a nice and comfy seat.

utterly impressive.

in school, they impress. they are really hardworking. they borrow volumes of voluminous volumes of economics to mug at home, that if language wasnt a barrier, they would just own all of us. this is something good about them, that they bring competition to singapore.

but they seem to mostly care about themselves. again, this is a hasty generalization, for even i know of prcs who are nice people who would go the extra mile to help his friend.

some of them totally dont care about pw or mess it up everytime they touch it. again this is hasty, for them in my group are really quite responsible folks. but from what i heard from my friends, spread out across classes, they tend to return with shoddy work or pervert the instructions to suit their laziness. clearly, disgusting.

some love surfing porn, especially from the genre of zhongguorencaolaowai. but im not interested to discuss this over here.

probably what strikes me most would be their intense nationalism, that they cannot take any insults real or fictitious on their glorious country and eternal chairman. lol. they would glare at you the glare that would take your breath away and scare the shit out of you. and when they are in huge numbers, you're scared that they turn violent.

haha. prcs have great impact on me, whether for the better or for the worse. the prcs outside school seem really like hooligans, the prcs in school cower in front of teachers. maybe they have been conditioned to be like that back home. clearly, more should be done to screen the immigrants.

time to go,
before i get run over by tanks.