Jaywalker II

to cut the crap, Atlas sided with the wrong side and was punished by zeus, who had him hold Gaia and the heavens apart. while more rightly portrayed as holding 2 spheres apart, it is quite common to find the foamer titan portrayed as holding a huge globe, the earth. more like getting pinned down by it, because its just massive. leaving aside the squabble on whether greeks always thought the earth to be flat or had discovered that it was a sphere through observation of ships from the horizon, one would indeed wonder what supported atlas as he supported earth and heaven. if i did not remember wrongly, Plato answered it in the Republic as being a huge celestial tortoise, supported by another celestial tortoise below, and another below, and all the way down to infinity and the Creator's intention.

i was reminded of this poor titan as i was crossing the road. more like jaywalking the road. since drinking from the chalice that was Dangerous Living, i have not looked back. dangerous living is fun and i always look for ways to regress towards infinite fun. so now i also jaywalk when there are vehicles on the road and when they travel fast too. one particular red vios had to ebrake just so that i would still live to cross the road again. that begs the question on why i crossed the road, but thats for another time. because it was fun. and the driver, a woman in her 30s was shocked. her face was white as sheets, i saw it from across the illegally tinted glass.

just minutes later i was at another crossing, near my place, where normally, nobody, save a few losers, ever bothered about the traffic light. it was pointless anyway, since the traffic light was meant for buses going into the interchange. and buses are not despatched very minute anyway, especially from this mininode. but at that very moment there was a whole mix of people waiting on the little island for the green man to flash. ns boys, ahsohs, ah lians, ah bengs, heartlanders, banglas. peculiar. i was being a man and interested to not let down my jaywalker credentials so i took 1 step out on the road. and i could feel all the puny little eyeballs staring at my figure from behind. then i took another step for mankind and i was 1/3 across the lane.

and then someone shouted, "小弟!", and i had to turn around and see who called out. it was this lauchio with a chariot and she had just done her shopping at the nearby ntuc. not typically verbose when alone with strangers, i just rose my eyebrow in bewilderment and hoped that she would explain why she was calling me, and not someone else.

gesticulating wildly, she mouthed the words "MaTa". and instantaneously without comprehending what she meant i stepped back on the curb. and then a white car with lights passed by and this puny spfsgt stared daggers through me. phew. this is what i call civic mindedness. if not i would have just gg-ed on the spot.

im quite glad that she was there to warn me. the foreigners there all pretended that they were watching an eclipse or looking for chewing gum on the ground. this incident changed completely the way i look at lauzhabors. they are no longer the pests that block my way, but fellow singaporeans who have helped me and will receive my help. i promise.

but jaywalking is still fun.

alliance ftw

C1 Thursday 2 December 2010
C2 Friday 3 December 2010
B2 Monday 9 December 2010
A1 Tuesday 6 December 2010
A2 Wednesday 7 December 2010
B1 Thursday 8 December 2010

jaywalker's guide to life

give way to me, or kill me.

that's the new cool, when one cant be the biggest steamroller around. living life is about living on the edge. and not mattering enough in death inasmuch as in life, so the steamrollers try to avoid the orgy of lawsuits that will accompany the insignificant death.

today i walked in front of a fastmoving car but didnt get hit. it felt great, so im trying it again soon.

rock on.

reckless

缺乏娱乐

i am real bored now. theres really nothing much i enjoy doing. im sick of reading and theres nothing nice on tv. and i can only watch that much youtube before the icky feeling of the lousy headphones get to me. woe be me. i need entertainment.

700

my brother flew back already. and ive only 1 last week of freedom if i dont extend my mc come wednesday. monday going back to handoverstore before going out for ord lunch. LOL. not my ord. but soon it will be mine ord lunch.

Om

this drilling is frustrating me. and making my mc very unpleasant. my tv speakers and my laptop headphone just arent good enough to resist the destructive interference without causing permanent deafness. its times like this when i think abou getting noise cancellation headphones, but they are expensive, hardly do the job anyway and my neighbors hacking is expected for only 2 more weeks. ONLY.

this is the second instance of the suffering. i will recommend everyone to refrain from buying ugly terrace houses, especially those built during the construction boom. the materials and workmanship are so poor, after a heavy rain or two the whole place floods, or the electricity trips up and owners with spare cash will start rebuilding. and many owners seem to have plenty of spare cash, judging from the number in my estate who have built an additional floor in addition to extending the BUA all round. some have even built garish mini swimming pools in their gardens. which are completely pointless because they are only 3-4m across.

it sucks to feel the drilling from below you. the whole ground just shakes. and the sound of the drilling just resonates through the minicaverns all over the house. when it gets really bad its like the drilling comes from within the skull.

need to meditate.

爱

i have rarely ever so passionately hated a show.

it is the draggiest, most repetitive show.

and channel 8 has to broadcast it every night, every single day of the week, around dinner time.

luckily i have cable.

veuve clicquot

what is elitism?

bubbles

i blew bubbles in the shower today. it was fun. i remember that i was very amused when as a little boy i discovered that i could make bubbles by forming a film with soap and water and blowing through it. it was somewhat a quantum leap; previously i just marvelled at the film formed and how the colors of the rainbow were captured by it. i was not a very smart kid.

standing there in the wet and dreary toilet that has since been refitted, i felt as if i was on top of the world. curiously, i did not experience a eureka moment and streak through my house and across the garden in elation. i have never had the urge to share my ideas, especially when i was young, because most of my ideas were stupid then, just as they are now. only the time i spent in the shower changed. and of course the amount of foam used increased tremendously, as i spent shower after shower, day after day, for weeks on end perfecting bubbles that were huge and did not break when contacted by the floor. i remember that i once created a bubble the size of my (then) head that survived till i stepped out of the toilet. and i managed to blow a bubble into another. i was five.

time passed, and i grew older. i stopped blowing bubbles in primary school. the novelty had long worn off by then, and i started using adult soap already. adult soap does not foam as easily. and television was no longer a once a week saturday date with power rangers and ninja turtles. it became a daily affair as tv12 improved its content by replacing ethnic shows with cartoons i enjoyed. quite quickly i forgot all about the bubbles. showers became shorter even though i continued to grow taller. anyway, my sight worsened with time, and i was already quite blind without my glasses even before i was 10. i could still see without my glasses then, just as now, but the lack of clarity irritates me much, so i appreciated times without glasses lesser and lesser.

by the time of jric, i had probably forgotten all about bubbles. until now, when i serendipitiously made webs between my fingers and breathed hard through them. with the right soap and the right amount of water and the right force, the bubbles formed and danced around in the air before resting on the walls. for the next half hour i became a child again. and i wasted quite a lot of soap. but i was happier from the cathartic experience. its a drug, really. momentarily, my senses were numbed and i felt the same floaty feeling as when i was five. those images of happier, more innocent times flooded back into my mind like a tsunami, filling every nook and cranny, knocking over those depressing thoughts. its the first time i have associated tsunami with anything positive.

i was happy then, and the feeling lingered on. then the happy tsunami waters receded back to where they came from, leaving behind those towers of depression that had been anchored so strongly by such impeccable foundation. before leaving the shower, i considerately doused the wall with 01Xjet of water and bade goodbye the scum that was the bubbles as it made its trip down the gulley and series of pipes and into the NEWater plant.

help!

post teen crisis! :(

things to do

1. find running buddy/buddies
2. pass ippt
3. clear combat shoot
4. clear tp
5. clear high keys *4
6. wisdom tooth *4 (wisdom teeth?)
7. clear off/leave
8. ord

my own planet

still feeling triumphant from yesterday. 2 more weeks of life the way id rather have it is just so awesome. must be all the good deeds i have done. poetic justice. after calling back to my workplace i know that this is the best way things can go. rocks. luckily i wasnt around during the mini-bhopal.

bastille

2 week extension. yay.

watch chinese drama cable

and you inevitably wonder,

are housewives menstruating all the time,

have weird discharge when they go to the beach or play tennis,

or always smell bad down there.

stupidmani

the worldcup has a profound impact on the lives of many, and by extension, the functioning of many organizations. for instance, my alma mater (lol), declared today off so there wont be a bunch of zombies dragging themselves to class to catch up on sleep there and then. its a wise move, because otherwise people will just play truant. aarons got today off, something he did not know until 1/2h before leaving for camp yesterday, which is also a good move, because some soldiers with bigballs and littlefuture might just go awol or if they have smallerballs and expect some future, just take an mc.

i expect this to happen in camp, while i am away. anyway the cruellest thing of all is that this is the busiest period in camp, i am on hospitalization leave, and i didnt even bother to stay up to watch the match. only knew of the scoreline about 2 hours ago when i checked my facebook account and saw the cascading facebook stati on everything from the lousy ref to the lousy mani. stupid mani lah. the owner better be ashamed. really mahoupao, riding on the coattails of paul the psychic octupus.

anyway with divine grace my understudy, a trained cq, has arrived and is in the process of taking over my work. 5 months from my ORD. which is good. i wish him the best of luck and i wish myself the best of luck. if he does a good job taking over my job im gonna be free as a bird, assuming nothing goes wrong. which i hope is the case as i trudge down the last stretch of my 2 year bondage.

... so bye, bye miss american pie

drove my chevy to the levee but the levee was dry

and them good old boys drinking whiskey and rye

singing 'this will be the day that i die'

'this will be the day that i die' ...

sleepless again

Sleep is a priceless commodity and something that i have come to value even more after handing over my pink ic. i remember in bmt, i knocked out before lights out every night except sunday night, because i didnt wake up at 0530 on sunday morning and shag myself out enough. and it used to take hardly 10 mins for me to get to sleep even at 10pm on a regular night at home. i feel safe at home, and this safety is soporific.

but ever since i started on my hospitalization leave, my body clock has been screwing up and sometimes i just cant seem to get to sleep. it is about 0200, the wee hours of the morning and im up again after spending the last hour or so tossing and turning on the bed. when i started i thought i was already shagged out after watching hongkong dramas on cable. but for some shitty reason or another i am still wide awake.

i think the lack of activity has made me cranky. i have been sleeping too much recently, and sometimes too late. the irregularity has caused some technical glitch within me, that i hope will be temporary. i have been trying to apply myself to something useful so i wont look back with regret, and i am glad to say i have been spending much time with my brother, who is back on a short holiday. and this is good. i have been keeping up with the news and paul the octopus. i did read some french, but its a lost cause because i simply lack the determination with anything tough. the unabridged leviathan also pissed me off. simply insane, that trayne of thought.

i was quite bored early yesterday and i was actually reading my old emails. thought that revisiting my emails would ignite some 'study' spark in me. it is quite funny how i have forgotten much of secondary school already, especially research education, and how i found my topics for sec 3 and 4 completely disappointing and unfulfilling. at the start we enjoyed ourselves too much without doing any work and at the end we were churning out junk to fill into the report. which was shit. i had quite a lot of nice people to work with and i enjoyed myself from that. but the substation thingy was something which i didnt enjoy much. i thought that exposing myself to something arty would improve the quality of my life, but it didnt. nevertheless in retrospect it was a good experience. the first time for me to stay out till late on a little street of shophouses tearing tickets, cleaning shit and typing random crap.

my french teacher was also very hardworking. a real email spammer. i think in a span of 2 years he sent out almost 100 emails on everything from the controle results to replies to questions by knowledge-hungry rgs amazons. i opened some of them and i found them absolutely amusing. he had his moody period when he gave curt short replies and his gay-french period when he explained shit through and through and posted cock about some random place in france hoping to inspire us to work harder and not play soggy biscuit at the back of the class. it mostly didnt work on me, and im living in regret. i have, starred, an email of the results of a controle where he the results of all his students were listed out with the last few digits of their nric. i was pleasantly surprised for a second to get 80+, then i remembered that i didnt understand the comprehension orale at all so it couldnt be me. i got 66%. it is funny now but quite shit then when it pulled down my gpa. if only i had the foresight to study my french. sigh, life is tough.

from 2006 there was plenty of emails from the rinccegroup, and many of them were really lame. most of the posts dealt with training updates, which didnt really make sense since all we did week after week was pt, drills and soccer. i was never into the uniformed group, but to save my A1 i forced myself to attend the sessions and all. so i was infinitely more involved in sec 4 than from sec 1 to 3 when i was floating around. i was reminded from the emails about the power struggle and some mudslinging and misunderstanding, but i hope all parties came out stronger and still remain friends.

those were formative years man. and i still am not drowsy. maybe bejeweled blitz will do the trick.

my life now is

WOW.

slack. slack. slack.

sadly, good times don't last forever.
but with a little bit of luck it can last a little longer.

hey friends!

1. going out with a person of the same gender (one on one) to the movies is really quite gay. i tried it once and i vow to never do it again, no matter how good the movie is. and whenever same gender pair outings happen between two people often i start to question their sexuality.

2. the classgirls, like zhenan, are quite rich. if you cant find them, they are either mugging hard in their secret mugging closet or worshipping and ogling and singing and dancing in church or planning cell group activities or in town to watch eclipse to get wet by robert pattinson. or else they are strolling around their backyard, which is roughly all the land and waters bounded by GMT +8 and GMT. mostly europe and the middle east for now.

3. classoutings generally end in failure because liquidincome distribution is grossly unequal. the gini coefficient tends to 1. not everyone comes from upper middle class families so not everyone can afford to watch movies without feeling the pinch. or fly over for a 3 day conference without saving all his hardearned monies from selling his services for duties. or make a pilgrimage to israel without cutting off a pound of flesh from his/her/its breast, closest to the heart, with/without spilling a drop of (relevant) blood.

4. not everyone has the same idea of fun and no one should be coerced to enjoy something he or she clearly doesnt. it sucks when the constituents of the class do not have overlapping areas of interest except mugging, and now that half the local class is in ns they dont have to mug, so the two halves of the class do not have overlapping areas of interest at all. going for buffets is something that some fervently enjoy, but others completely dont, with some even angsting about it. tough.

5. everything bad is mao tsetungs fault.

reminisce

old friends are good friends. good to know that they are all doing well, and somethings never change. maybe the more things change the more they become the same. the tides of time obscure memories but its great force also wears down the sharp, jagged edges. somethings we have forgotten, but others we remember, and someamong them stand out. HAL fell out of my memory but yesterday it came back in again. and studying overseas seems to provide them with winning job offers upwards of 5000 pounds realistically is ftw. what is more ftw is that these people can also tour europe, from sweden to france to italy, eat at four seasons, fly to a 3 day conference in singapore, so they dont actually need to earn so much so quickly because their families can sustain their ftw lifestly. my starting pay wont even cross sgd 5000 and thats despite me spending 2 years in ns and completing my masters. and i dont think i can travel so much. its alright, because i am happy for them, as long as they upload photos where i can also enjoy the sights from across the universe, albeit through a screen.

in summary,

thanks for the memories.

sleepless

it's past 1am where i am and i cannot seem to get to sleep. tossing and turning for an hour made me foam, even though i enjoy lazing on the bed. that happy feeling probably comes in the day when i dont want to get up, not from when i cannot get to sleep. i think its the tea i drank during lunch. it was fragrant and potent. i always knew that i had a low tolerance for caffeine, but i didnt realise chinese tea had caffeine. but now i know. wikipedia.

extended my mc by 2 weeks. which makes me happy. i guess i am recovering pretty much normally and the specialist is just having me visit him more by putting my appointments every fortnight and extending my mc from appointment to appointment. he probably knows that i will get too slack to turn up otherwise. i hope i can at least get 1 more extension so that i am at the market average.

this is the life man. with the 2 more weeks it makes 6 consecutive weeks of slacking. which is by far the longest trot since secondary school. i have never felt less guilty watching tv half the day, and i thank providence for cable tv. history channel, discovery turbo, mtv and the 800 series and more. i have hardly left my house since my surgery, but through facebook i have come to enjoy the beautiful sceneries that litter europe and the perverse games of local uni orientations. i have also caught up with all my friends i cherish much. and nothing is more divine than the knowledge that these decadent days chip away at my ns liability, which is down into the last 160 days, including the weekends, public holidays and my 14 days of leave. and assorted offs and stuffs. haha.

this blissful state of nature will make my return to camp agonizing. but before that it has put my life out of whack. i sleep around midnight and wake up at 10am. and even reading has become a chore, and i no longer have the discipline to hit the basic french book. my mind has come to lust for simple, direct and available pleasures, no longer will it work for the sublime, higher pleasures, like from reading or something. because to convert and unify the impulses from reading has become too tough. and anyway the pleasure of french is not something quite tangible now. and french girls dont go to bed with you just because "voulez-vous coucher avec moi, ce soir" rolls of your tongue so easily.

i have been idling much and finding so much about myself, that i have become too weak and too pleasure seeking. and thats bad.