Sunday, November 7, 2010

teenage dreams

ain't gonna be forever young. sometimes, we all have to live for the moment. i spent this weekend, the last of my teenage doing just that. i did not have any plan, and if i did i dropped them before even trying. i have not touched my french since the eve of deepavali. and i did no work, went no where to do anything specially. i had meals, i lazed around, i slept, i watched television, and i played mahjong titans. i felt the need to indulge in such hedonism of the moment, but after completing most of it i felt so sorry to myself for wasting all my time doing shit. i need to plan, even for leisure, so i dont feel like i am wasting time. i had this feeling. it sucks, really. and i feel really guilty, because now i have lost precious mugging time, and my chance of failing the exam has increased quite a bit. i am so screwed.

anyway, i am feeling unwell already. i think its the medicine. it is working, and the effects are showing. i have lesser lesions already, but at the same time my skin is all dry and scaly and i am really shedding skinflakes. and my lips are so dry even though i religiously wear lip balm. it is scary. i cannot even open my mouth fully without my lips tearing. and the skin around my mouth and at my joints are so cracked they are all red as tomatoes. i am so dehydrated, i feel like dying. i have a little headache now. maybe its cos i slacked too much in front of the computer. when i do too much of this i feel unwell.

i should stop and go arrange my stuff and draw out some plans.

au revoir tout le monde.

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