Thursday, June 12, 2008

this is my neighbor. i killed his brother.

over lunch i was watching a documentary on history channel on the rwandan genocide. as pictures of mounds of dead tutsis and hutus just fill the screen for minutes on end, i felt queasy. the blood, still fresh, on the PRC made machetes, the severed limbs, the smashed skulls and all.

i couldnt eat. but i dont think its because of the graphic violence of one man, on another man who have lived beside him and played football with him since they were small. and then his brother crying after he said that he forgave his confused friend. it was just that my mind was drawn back to my gp essay on non-interference.

now i dont regret that very statement, that even if 1 million rwandans were killed, the belgian government should not have let 14 belgian soldiers die or even let any belgian soldiers come in harms way because belgian interests in rwanda were minimal. i dont regret this statement, because i am a firm believer in Pax Westphalia. and natural selection. whatever.

i couldnt eat because i knew i had written probably the worst essay in my life. i rewrote it over 3 times, the arguments were a little disjointed as i tried to wrestle myself out of the torpor that overcame me for reasons i still do not know. the essay was a load of bullshit, and it would really take a miracle for me to extend my run on the deans list for gp. and so i couldnt eat. i felt miserable.

anyway, i was watching some sports illustrated: swimsuit edition on youtube. you can watch them too! they are nice and they are not considered pornographic because, there is no nudity or sexual acts. and the models are real hot, i might even consider selling myself out to mephistopheles just to possess the posse of them.

i think after mugging, me and you and the dog named boo deserve a good break.

No comments: